Last weekend I woke up around 7am and after about two hours I decided to try and nap a bit since I was still feeling exhausted. I lay back down and managed to drift off just slightly but my brain would not shut down. It’s the oddest thing, there I was, sleepy and feeling tired but when I decided to lay down, my pink jello in my cranium would not stop thinking… about a million little things. I did not get any additional rest though I really wanted to do so.
Why does that happen? I want to nap. I feel the urge… and then my brain is doing a mile a minute so nope, no nap for this gal. Come on brain, you’re the one inducing my tiredness. What the fudge?
I was listening to a friend talking about astrology and how they enjoyed looking at their daily horoscope and it took immense amount of control not to roll my eyes. Look, let us be completely honest, those stars and planets so many light years away have not a singular thing to do with your life, your love life, your personality or the future.
“Oh but I’m an Aries and he’s a Taurus and we’re not compatible.” Umm.. no. You’ve got issues and he’s got issues… nothing to do with the month you’re both born in or the retro grade of the stars. What does that crap even mean? Out of arguments sake I did some research on my “sign”. Some things written there were very true while others were so off base it was a joke. I consider that like blind hammering: you’ll make contact eventually and a few times but others will be clear misses.
So look to the stars… not for your future or your romantic endeavors but for the beauty of seeing those planets and stars which are so far away and dream about what life out there is like instead.
When I get home from a hard day at work, it’s around 7pm when I am finally done cleaning the kitchen, been finally able to sit in front of my computer and scroll through either youtube to view my subscriptions, facebook to catch up a bit or watched some movies. Yet it feels as if I blink and poof … it’s 10pm.
I just sat down for a short bit. Where has this night gone? Time just seems to jump into hyper-drive and off it goes. At the time I look at the corner of my computer screen it’s nearly past my bedtime and I need to tuck myself in. Even as I write this my time for the night is nearly done and I’m about to dive head first into bed. I know this happens to everyone, in one way or another. Tending to your family, studying, etc.
I have a few media outlets in which I share my info: facebook, instagram and linkedin are just a few. Each one is locked down so unless I know you and want to share my personal stuff, you won’t see it. There are strangers who will randomly want to connect via either instagram or linked in simply because they are looking to add onto their own numbers or just snoop on the info you show online. Dear strangers, that’s a bit not cool to me. If I know you or want to know you, that’s one thing… most times if there is not existing connection there, goodbye, I don’t want to share with you, thanks for asking but no.
The amount of times that same media outlet tries to have me connect to a stranger (am looking at YOU facebook) is kinda creepy and unnecessary, thank you much or the algorithms used by linked in needs to settle it’s ass down and stop attempting to advise me to connect with a stranger who I have nothing in common with.
I want to share my stuff… with those I want to share and only them.
Today I was shadowing two younger coworkers when we had to go up five stories, which would’ve been okay had we taken the elevator. However, one of them made a joke about taking the stairs and the other decided it was a great idea since the elevators take a while to arrive. Up we went. By the fourth level we were all a bit out of breathe but I was really feeling out of it.
For a few seconds, after we arrived on the fifth floor, I was having a nearly out of body experience with my lungs feeling only half filled with oxygen even with each deep breath in I took they simply did not feel filled and the outer bands of my peripherals getting just a bit fuzzy. It doesn’t help that I am a decade or more than them and I am quite over what my weight should be.
It was honestly the scariest thing I’ve felt in a while.
It was not something I hope to ever, ever feel again.
On most nights only one of my nostrils is working and sometimes I just don’t perceive as if there is enough air around. I cannot even imagine what it feels like for an asthmatic. That frantic need to pull in oxygen.. and you cannot take it in. Have mercy on someone who cannot breathe.
I like walking.. in fact, it’s about the only kind of exercise I find myself doing. Running is out because I might knock myself unconscious with these boobs colliding with my jaw. Yoga was done for a while however I’m hardly flexible and plus when trying to hold a position I breathe my inflexibility causes me to make some loud noises. I could ride my bicycle but I usually don’t have time in the mornings and evenings I’m too tired.
I did a fair amount of walking today which felt good. I get to do quite a bit of it when visiting the Disney parks but there is so much dodging and weaving around people that it feels more like a strategy game… until you come to the ride you are planning on going on… and then you’re just standing… and waiting, a lot. Sorry Fast passes but you only help a bit.
My poor sneakers are going to be worn down a lot quicker, my back is a bit tight, my legs are stiff.. and yet, it’s a really good feeling. I feel accomplished. I feel energized. Exhausted but still ready to see what takes me where tomorrow. Just let me lace up these sneakers and I’ll be ready for it.
Since my car was in the shop this morning from 7am until almost 3pm, I was looking online at the offer that a local supermarket named Publix has: if you sign up for Instacart, you can get your first order free! (If you then decide to continue you pay a per order of like $6 or an annual fee of $35). In the time I signed up and scrolled, the wait time went from just an hour and went up to as much as two hours since it seems they book them according to orders getting filled out. Am not sure. It was early in the morning so I didn’t believe that there were many folks at home on a Monday, but what do I know?
Some of the items had a definite price increase, it was readily noticeable since there are things I normally buy within the store. They offered blueberries but they were only the organic ones… which are never the same price as the non. The selection available was pretty darned good and as I fluctuated between waiting for my car to be returned to me or placing an actual one time free order, I remembered that one thing I like about food shopping: picking up the food, smelling it, feeling it and picking what I sense to be the best one. You totally lose that. You’re dependent upon someone else’s senses and choice. That’s one thing when you’re in a restaurant but when you food shop for yourself, it’s a tad bit bothersome to me.
Therefore, I waited with great patience and once I was mobile again, I went there and filled up my own shopping cart, piled the items into my own vehicle and came home to rejoice in my meals.